复活八日庆期星期五 弥撒福音省思

福音(耶稣上前来,祂把饼递给他们,同样把鱼递给他们)
恭读圣若望福音 21:1-14
耶稣在提庇黎雅海再次显现给门徒。祂是这样显现的。西满伯多禄,那被称作狄狄默的多默,在加里肋亚加纳的纳塔乃耳,载伯德的两个儿子,祂的另两个门徒在一起的时候。西满伯多禄对他们说:“我要去捕鱼。”他们对他说:“我们也要和你一起去。”于是,他们出去上船,可是,那天晚上,他们什么也没有捕到。黎明时分,耶稣站在岸边,门徒却不知道那是耶稣。耶稣对他们说:“孩子们,你们捕到什么吃的了吗?”他们回答祂说:“没有。”于是,祂对他们说:“把网撒在船的右边,你们就会捕到一些。”他们就撒网,因为鱼的数量太多,他们拉不上来。耶稣所爱的那个门徒对伯多禄说:“这是主。”西满伯多禄一听说这是救主,因为他穿得单薄,就穿上衣服,跳到海里。别的门徒上船,因为他们离岸不远,只有约一百码,拖着捕到的鱼。他们上岸的时候,看到一堆炭火,上面有鱼和饼。耶稣对他们说:“拿一些你们刚捕到的鱼来。”于是,西满伯多禄就去,把满一百五十三条鱼的网拖上岸来。尽管数量多,网却没有破。耶稣对他们说:“来吃早饭吧。”没有一个门徒敢问祂说:“祢是谁?”因为他们认出这是主。耶稣上前拿上饼,递给他们,祂同样把鱼递给他们。这是耶稣从死者中复活后第三次向门徒显现。

省思

我们时常会如同今日出海捕鱼的耶稣的门徒一样,为了满足日常生活所需,不计一切代价,却没有随从天主圣神的引导,一心向往天上的事。有时,当我们为了满足生计,按照我们心中所思,拼尽全力,却没有得到想要的结果,一如今日门徒在清晨初次出海捕鱼时,他们整夜劳苦,却一无所获。(参看:若21:1-4)事实上,属于这个世界的一切,并不能使我们获得天主赏赐给我们的,自创世之初就给我们预备下的福乐。

亲爱的主内!我们如果随从天主圣神的引导,便会获得不一样的结果。今天,那些出海捕鱼的门徒,当他们遵照救主的训示,便取得了心中所想望的结果。(参看:若21:5-11)也许我们在生活中,特别是在每日的灵修生活中,想要按照自己心中的想法,意图凭借自己的力量,为自己赚得属于这个世界的一切,甚至想要操纵天主,想要天主按照我们所渴望的一切,赏赐那由我们心中产生的一切妄动果实,但当我们发现,自己所做的一切,已是枉然,我们便会在心中产生怨恨天主的念想,因而逐渐疏远天主,我们的结局,便是陷入魔鬼和牠的使者给我们设下的陷阱和罗网之中,当那一日来到时,我们定会因随从肉性的妄动,灵魂和肉身同陷于永久的丧亡之中。

我们时常会有机会参与弥撒圣祭,当我们参与这为纪念吾主基督的逾越而举行修好之祭时,我们应特别注意当我们由司铎的手中,领受吾主耶稣赐给我们的祂的圣体和圣血的时刻,这一恩宠之时刻,是弥足珍贵的。因为创造和宰制万有的天主,亲自临于我们心中,愿意我们从祂恩宠的府库中,汲取丰厚的滋养,祂更邀请我们藉着从圣体圣事中所领受的一切恩宠,在身心获得滋养之后,以自己的实际行动,将救主光荣复活的喜讯,通过我们的口,向一切受造物宣传,为使天主按照祂的圣意创造的一切,与我们共同享受因吾主基督的光荣复活带来的喜乐,与我们一起在基督对世人的无限慈爱内,就是在祂恩宠的府库中,重获新生,恢复往日的活力。

©全属于祢 2026
Cum Approbatione Ecclesiastica

與主嘆啡:2026年4月15日

2026年4月15日
復活期第二周星期三
福音:若3:16-21

今天是復活期第二周星期三。彌撒福音取自聖若望福音中,若望對耶穌和尼苛德摩有關重生和新生的談話之後的感想。

我們現今生活的這個世界,充斥著各種由人的內心深處所流露出來的情感。在這些複雜且多變的情感中,有些是對未來美好生活的嚮往,有些是對天鄉的渴望,但更多的,則是人心裡出來惡念,邪淫、盜竊、兇殺、姦淫、貪吝、毒辣、詭詐、放蕩、嫉妒、譭謗、驕傲、愚妄(參看:穀7:21-22)在我們看來,人生活在這個世界上,不可避免的會受到屬於這個世界的一切的影響,這成了我們隨意給他人下各種判斷的藉口。以致我們也會認為:耶穌所說的天主,是公義的天主,祂來到世上,為的是定我們每個人的罪,以施行審判為樂。

若望作證說:“天主竟這樣愛了世界,甚至賜下自己的獨生子,使一切信從祂的人不至喪亡,反而獲得永生,因為天主沒有派遣子到世界上來審判世界,而是為叫世界藉著祂而獲救。”(若3:16-17)仰賴基督所賜予的恩寵,我們得以藉著領受基督的聖洗,由罪惡及死亡中解脫出來,不再生活在因罪惡給我們的靈魂帶來的死亡之中。既然我們因著領受基督的洗禮和天主聖神的傅油與祂結合,就要懷有同樣的勇氣去接受基督之光,不再如同黑暗之子那樣行事,而是要如同光明之子那樣行事。

上主,我們每年回憶這些奧跡,人類本性藉此奧跡恢復了原本的尊嚴,領受了再次復活的希望。求祢使我們以信德慶祝的,也能在無盡的愛中領受。藉著祢的子,我們的主耶穌基督,祢和祂及聖神,是天主,永生永王。亞孟。

©全屬於祢 2026
Cum Approbatione Ecclesiastica

与主叹啡:2026年4月15日

2026年4月15日
复活期第二周星期三
福音:若3:16-21

今天是复活期第二周星期三。弥撒福音取自圣若望福音中,若望对耶稣和尼苛德摩有关重生和新生的谈话之后的感想。

我们现今生活的这个世界,充斥着各种由人的内心深处所流露出来的情感。在这些复杂且多变的情感中,有些是对未来美好生活的向往,有些是对天乡的渴望,但更多的,则是人心里出来恶念,邪淫、盗窃、凶杀、奸淫、贪吝、毒辣、诡诈、放荡、嫉妒、毁谤、骄傲、愚妄(参看:谷7:21-22)在我们看来,人生活在这个世界上,不可避免的会受到属于这个世界的一切的影响,这成了我们随意给他人下各种判断的借口。以致我们也会认为:耶稣所说的天主,是公义的天主,祂来到世上,为的是定我们每个人的罪,以施行审判为乐。

若望作证说:“天主竟这样爱了世界,甚至赐下自己的独生子,使一切信从祂的人不至丧亡,反而获得永生,因为天主没有派遣子到世界上来审判世界,而是为叫世界藉着祂而获救。”(若3:16-17)仰赖基督所赐予的恩宠,我们得以藉着领受基督的圣洗,由罪恶及死亡中解脱出来,不再生活在因罪恶给我们的灵魂带来的死亡之中。既然我们因着领受基督的洗礼和天主圣神的傅油与祂结合,就要怀有同样的勇气去接受基督之光,不再如同黑暗之子那样行事,而是要如同光明之子那样行事。

上主,我们每年回忆这些奥迹,人类本性藉此奥迹恢复了原本的尊严,领受了再次复活的希望。求祢使我们以信德庆祝的,也能在无尽的爱中领受。藉着祢的子,我们的主耶稣基督,祢和祂及圣神,是天主,永生永王。亚孟。

©全属于祢 2026
Cum Approbatione Ecclesiastica

Coffee with God: April 15, 2026

April 15, 2026
Wednesday of the Second Week of Easter
Gospel: John 3:16-21

Today is Wednesday of the Second Week of Easter. The Gospel for Mass is taken from the reflections of John in the Gospel of Saint John, following the conversation between Jesus and Nicodemus about rebirth and new life.

The world we live in today is filled with various emotions that flow from the depths of the human heart. Among these complex and changeable emotions, some are aspirations for a better future, some are longings for the heavenly homeland, but more often, they are evil thoughts: unchastity, theft, murder, adultery, greed, malice, deceit, licentiousness, envy, slander, pride, foolishness (see: Mark 7:21-22). In our view, as people living in this world, we are inevitably influenced by all that belongs to it, and this becomes an excuse for us to make arbitrary judgments of others. So much so that we may even think: the God spoken of by Jesus is a just God, who came into the world to condemn each of us, rejoicing in passing judgment.

John testifies: “God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him might not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to judge the world, but that the world might be saved through him” (John 3:16-17). By the grace granted by Christ, we are freed from sin and death through receiving the Baptism of Christ, no longer living in the death that sin brings to our souls. Since we are united with Him through receiving the Baptism of Christ and the anointing of the Holy Spirit, let us have the same courage to accept the light of Christ—no longer acting as children of darkness, but as children of light.

As we recall year by year the mysteries
by which, through the restoration of its original dignity,
human nature has received the hope of rising again,
we earnestly beseech your mercy, Lord,
that what we celebrate in faith
we may possess in unending love.
Through our Lord Jesus Christ, your Son,
who lives and reigns with you in the unity of the Holy Spirit,
God, for ever and ever

©Totus Tuus 2026
Cum Approbatione Ecclesiastica

與主嘆啡:2026年4月14日

2026年4月14日
復活期第二周星期二
福音:若3:7B-15

今天是復活期第二周星期二。彌撒福音取自聖若望福音中,耶穌和尼苛德摩之間對話的敘事。

我們時常會如同尼苛德摩一樣,按照我們對事物的看法,講述從我們的眼中所看到的這個世界。在我們看來,我們眼中的這個世界,是一個物質生活極其豐富的世界。幾時我們的雙目注視著屬於這個世界的一切,我們便會如同那些親眼看到耶穌所做的一切,親耳聽到耶穌所宣講的一切,仍拒絕相信耶穌就是自天降下的人子。

耶穌對尼苛德摩說:“如果我給你們講論世上的事,你們尚且不相信,如果我給你們講論天上的事,你們又怎麼會相信呢?”(參看:若3:12)祂所說的“世上的事”,就是祂要在這個註定要消逝的世界建立的天主的世界,祂所說的“天上的事”,就是耶穌要帶給這個的天主之國的事理。猶太人不信耶穌所說的一切,是因為他們認為耶穌是瑪利亞之子,而非天主之子,他們渴望一個能拯救他們脫離羅馬人的政治性默西亞,而非天主的默西亞。

今天,在我們的團體內,也有許多人按照字面意思來理解耶穌所說的一切。我願意對這些兄弟姐妹說:富於仁慈的主基督,願意將祂將祂自己賜給了我們,為使我們能藉著領受祂的聖洗,在祂從地上被高舉時而洞開的聖肋之中流出的慈悲的源泉,洗淨因原罪給我們帶來的罪汙,為使我們能藉著所領受的聖洗,穿上基督,在基督內重獲新生。當我們在天主聖三圓滿的共融中,領受如此偉大愛情的聖事時,我們便是相信那由自天降下而仍在天上的人子,並相信從祂口中發出的一切言語,從中得知天國的真相。

全能的天主,求祢使我們能宣講復活之主的德能,好叫我們既已領受祂恩典有確證,當祂所賜的一切完全顯現時,能獲享祂所賜的諸恩。藉著祢的子,我們的主耶穌基督,祢和祂及聖神,是天主,永生永王。亞孟。

©全屬於祢 2026
Cum Approbatione Ecclesiastica

与主叹啡:2026年4月14日

2026年4月14日
复活期第二周星期二
福音:若3:7B-15

今天是复活期第二周星期二。弥撒福音取自圣若望福音中,耶稣和尼苛德摩之间对话的叙事。

我们时常会如同尼苛德摩一样,按照我们对事物的看法,讲述从我们的眼中所看到的这个世界。在我们看来,我们眼中的这个世界,是一个物质生活极其丰富的世界。几时我们的双目注视着属于这个世界的一切,我们便会如同那些亲眼看到耶稣所做的一切,亲耳听到耶稣所宣讲的一切,仍拒绝相信耶稣就是自天降下的人子。

耶稣对尼苛德摩说:“如果我给你们讲论世上的事,你们尚且不相信,如果我给你们讲论天上的事,你们又怎么会相信呢?”(参看:若3:12)祂所说的“世上的事”,就是祂要在这个注定要消逝的世界建立的天主的世界,祂所说的“天上的事”,就是耶稣要带给这个的天主之国的事理。犹太人不信耶稣所说的一切,是因为他们认为耶稣是玛利亚之子,而非天主之子,他们渴望一个能拯救他们脱离罗马人的政治性默西亚,而非天主的默西亚。

今天,在我们的团体内,也有许多人按照字面意思来理解耶稣所说的一切。我愿意对这些兄弟姐妹说:富于仁慈的主基督,愿意将祂将祂自己赐给了我们,为使我们能藉着领受祂的圣洗,在祂从地上被高举时而洞开的圣肋之中流出的慈悲的源泉,洗净因原罪给我们带来的罪污,为使我们能藉着所领受的圣洗,穿上基督,在基督内重获新生。当我们在天主圣三圆满的共融中,领受如此伟大爱情的圣事时,我们便是相信那由自天降下而仍在天上的人子,并相信从祂口中发出的一切言语,从中得知天国的真相。

全能的天主,求祢使我们能宣讲复活之主的德能,好叫我们既已领受祂恩典有确证,当祂所赐的一切完全显现时,能获享祂所赐的诸恩。藉着祢的子,我们的主耶稣基督,祢和祂及圣神,是天主,永生永王。亚孟。

©全属于祢 2026
Cum Approbatione Ecclesiastica

Coffee with God: April 14, 2026

April 14, 2026
Tuesday of the Second Week of Easter
Gospel: 3:7B-15

Today is Tuesday of the Second Week of Easter. The Gospel for Mass is taken from the narrative of the dialogue between Jesus and Nicodemus in the Gospel of Saint John.

We often, like Nicodemus, speak of this world as we see it with our eyes, according to our perception of things. In our view, this world we behold is one of extreme material abundance. When our gaze is fixed on all that belongs to this world, we become like those who saw with their own eyes all that Jesus did and heard with their own ears all that He preached yet refused to believe that Jesus is the Son of Man come down from heaven.

Jesus said to Nicodemus: “If I have told you about earthly things and you do not believe, how will you believe if I tell you about heavenly things?” (See: John 3:12). What He meant by “earthly things” was the kingdom of God He intended to establish in this world destined to pass away; what He meant by “heavenly things” was the truth of the Kingdom of God that Jesus would bring to this world. The Jews did not believe all that Jesus said because they thought Jesus was the son of Mary, not the Son of God; they longed for a political Messiah who could save them from the Romans, not the Messiah of God.

Today, within our community, many also understand everything Jesus said in a literal sense. I wish to say to these brothers and sisters: The merciful Lord Christ desired to give Himself to us, so that through receiving His Baptism, we might be cleansed of the stain of original sin from the source of mercy flowing from His pierced side when He was lifted up from the earth. And so that through the same Baptism, we might put on Christ and be born anew in Him. When we receive this sacrament of such great love in the full communion of the Most Holy Trinity, we believe in the Son of Man who came down from heaven and is still in heaven, and in all the words that proceed from His mouth, learning from them the truth of the Kingdom.

Enable us, we pray, almighty God,
to proclaim the power of the risen Lord,
that we, who have received the pledge of his gift,
may come to possess all he gives
when it is fully revealed.
Through our Lord Jesus Christ, your Son,
who lives and reigns with you in the unity of the Holy Spirit,
God, for ever and ever

©Totus Tuus 2026
Cum Approbatione Ecclesiastica

2025-2026(甲)復活期第二主日:看不見的傷口:多默內心旅途的反思

看不見的傷口:多默內心旅途的反思
福音:若望20:19-31


Fr. Jijo Kandamkulathy, CMF
Claretian Missionaries

讓我帶你走進多默的內心世界。他不是世人眼中那種漫畫式的“懷疑者”,也不是固執地強求科學實證的經驗主義者。他是一個被深切哀痛擊碎了心的真實之人,正經歷著生命中最迷惘的八日時光。


一周的第一天。瑪利亞·瑪達肋納帶著難以置信的消息跑來:“我看見了主。”多默聽了,他想要相信。可哀慟總能把希望化為無聲的質問:倘若祂還活著,當我們釘死祂時,祂在哪裡?當我逃跑時,祂又在哪裡?


那天晚上,其他門徒聚在緊閉的門後,多默卻不在其中。我們不知緣由。或許他需要透口氣,或許受不了他們戰慄的低語,又或許獨自去哭泣了。他回來時,眾人的神情已全然不同:伯多祿幾乎要笑出聲,若望流著淚——卻不是因悲傷。他們告訴他:“我們看見了主。”


多默靜靜聽著,一言不發。可在他內心深處,一場風暴已然掀起。


“你們都看見了?你們所有人?就在我出去的時候?就在我獨自沉浸在痛苦中時,祂來找你們了?為何不來找我?我做錯了什麼?是我離棄祂太快嗎?祂是否覺得我的背棄比伯多祿的更嚴重?伯多祿以詛咒否認祂,耶穌仍顯現給他;可對我呢?什麼都沒有。”


那夜,多默躺在床上,徹夜難眠。他心中一遍遍重演著過去一周的每一幕:耶穌被捕、受審、在加爾瓦略山上,正午的黑暗,那聲呼喊,以及隨之而來的靜默。他曾以強烈而務實的方式深深地愛著耶穌。當耶穌說“我們去拉匝祿那裡,即便意味著赴死”,多默是那個回應“我們也去,與他同死”的人。他不是懦夫,他只是願意與老師共赴死亡。可當死亡真正來臨時,他卻和眾人一樣逃跑了。這逃跑的羞辱,成了一道比任何釘痕更深的傷口。


如今,其他門徒都聲稱:“我們看見了主”。他們描述那間屋子、緊閉的門、突然的臨在、那聲“願平安與你們同在”的問候,還有所展示的手和肋旁。多默聽著每一個細節,心怦怦直跳,理智卻在抗拒。


“他們在說謊?不,他們不是騙子。他們產生幻覺了?哀慟確實會讓人行為異常。可十個門徒怎會有相同幻覺?除非……除非這是真的。”


隨即,一個更可怕念頭浮現:“若真如此,祂去了他們那裡,卻沒來我這裡。為何?是我不夠忠信?祂忘了我?還是故意將我排除在外?”


這才是多默真正的痛苦。不是對復活的理性懷疑,而是被排斥的傷口。他當時不在場,錯過了那次顯現。在這八日的沉寂中,他的缺席化作一聲低語:“你不配,你不被愛。其他門徒都特殊,你被遺棄了。”


你是否也有過這樣的經驗?在祈禱團體中,他人談著恩寵,你靜坐無語;在感恩祭中,他人喜極而泣,你卻毫無觸動;在失落時,別人似乎領受天主的記號,你的心卻如荒漠一般空曠。這就是多默的感受,也是你我的感受。

多默的那句名言——“除非我看見釘痕,並把手指探入祂的肋膀,否則我不會相信”——並非科學實證的要求,而是受傷心靈的呼喊:“祢若真實,就讓我看見;祢若愛我,就證明給我。因為此刻,我覺得自己就是被遺忘的門徒,是被祢忽略的人。”


他對同伴們說這話時,或許聲音太大,帶著苦澀的鋒芒。眾人都沉默了,不知如何回應。在那靜默中,多默後悔自己的衝動,可話已出口,無法收回,他的要求依然立著。

第八天到了,又是一周的第一天。門徒再次聚集,這次多默來了。他差點沒來,想裹著“傷痛的毯子”待在家裡,可某種力量——希望?習慣?對舊團體的念想?——把他拉了回來。他坐在角落,一言不發,不抱期待。
耶穌就在那裡。


沒有敲門,沒有開門,唯有臨在。同樣問候:“願平安與你們同在。”接著,耶穌沒有指責,也沒有責備,徑直轉向多默,溫和地說出那句曾被多默當作挑戰的話:“把你的手指伸到這裡,看看我的手!伸出你的手,探入我的肋旁。不要作不信的人,而要相信。”

這就是多默靈性生命的轉捩點。他曾說:“除非我觸摸,否則我不會相信。”但當他真正面對復活的主,他卻沒有觸摸。經文沒有說他觸摸了,只說了他的回應:“我主,我的天主!”
為什麼,那一瞬間發生了什麼?

多默終於明白:他對觸摸的執著,不是為了觸摸本身,而是為了被人看見,被人認識,他希望救主能認可他 —— 多默,那曾不在場的門徒,那個感覺自己被冷落的門徒,那個因痛苦而魯莽發言的門徒。而耶穌,不僅回應了他的要求,甚至用他自己的話來回應他。這意味著耶穌俯允了他。耶穌聽到了八天前,他在這鎖著的屋子裡說的憤怒的話。耶穌沒有忘記他,反而專程為他而來。


那一刻,多默不再需要觸摸。耶穌提出讓他觸摸的邀請,已是足夠的證明——主知道他的名字,明白他的傷口,知他隱秘的羞恥,卻依然走向他。沒有說教,沒有“我早說過”,只有邀請:“來看吧,觸摸吧,真的是我。”


多默的心扉豁然敞開,不是因為證據,而是因為愛。八日來的煎熬——嫉妒、恐懼、被棄感、自我厭棄——在一聲呼喊中盡數消散。“我主,我的天主!”這不是神學術語,是認出祂的驚歎:“祢屬於我,我也屬於祢。我從未被排除,祢一直等我回來。”

如果你就是今天的多默 —— 如果你未曾看見,如果你感到被忽視,如果你的祈禱撞上沉默的天花板,如果你的創傷已化為苛刻的要求 —— 請你記得:救主不會因你誠實的痛苦而受到冒犯。祂從來沒有把你拒之門外。祂期待你回到那扇緊閉的門後、回到團體之中。而當你回去的時候,祂已在那裡。祂會呼喚你的名字,祂會展示祂的聖傷。你不一定需要觸摸。你只需要跪下,說:“我主,我的天主。”

© 全屬於祢 & 樂仁出版社(中國澳門)
Cum Approbatione Ecclesiastica 2026

2025-2026(甲)复活期第二主日:看不见的伤口:多默内心旅途的反思

看不见的伤口:多默内心旅途的反思
福音:若望20:19-31


Fr. Jijo Kandamkulathy, CMF
Claretian Missionaries

让我带你走进多默的内心世界。他不是世人眼中那种漫画式的“怀疑者”,也不是固执地强求科学实证的经验主义者。他是一个被深切哀痛击碎了心的真实之人,正经历着生命中最迷惘的八日时光。


一周的第一天。玛利亚·玛达肋纳带着难以置信的消息跑来:“我看见了主。”多默听了,他想要相信。可哀恸总能把希望化为无声的质问:倘若祂还活着,当我们钉死祂时,祂在哪里?当我逃跑时,祂又在哪里?


那天晚上,其他门徒聚在紧闭的门后,多默却不在其中。我们不知缘由。或许他需要透口气,或许受不了他们战栗的低语,又或许独自去哭泣了。他回来时,众人的神情已全然不同:伯多禄几乎要笑出声,若望流着泪——却不是因悲伤。他们告诉他:“我们看见了主。”


多默静静听着,一言不发。可在他内心深处,一场风暴已然掀起。


“你们都看见了?你们所有人?就在我出去的时候?就在我独自沉浸在痛苦中时,祂来找你们了?为何不来找我?我做错了什么?是我离弃祂太快吗?祂是否觉得我的背弃比伯多禄的更严重?伯多禄以诅咒否认祂,耶稣仍显现给他;可对我呢?什么都没有。”


那夜,多默躺在床上,彻夜难眠。他心中一遍遍重演着过去一周的每一幕:耶稣被捕、受审、在加尔瓦略山上,正午的黑暗,那声呼喊,以及随之而来的静默。他曾以强烈而务实的方式深深地爱着耶稣。当耶稣说“我们去拉匝禄那里,即便意味着赴死”,多默是那个回应“我们也去,与他同死”的人。他不是懦夫,他只是愿意与老师共赴死亡。可当死亡真正来临时,他却和众人一样逃跑了。这逃跑的羞辱,成了一道比任何钉痕更深的伤口。


如今,其他门徒都声称:“我们看见了主”。他们描述那间屋子、紧闭的门、突然的临在、那声“愿平安与你们同在”的问候,还有所展示的手和肋旁。多默听着每一个细节,心怦怦直跳,理智却在抗拒。


“他们在说谎?不,他们不是骗子。他们产生幻觉了?哀恸确实会让人行为异常。可十个门徒怎会有相同幻觉?除非……除非这是真的。”


随即,一个更可怕念头浮现:“若真如此,祂去了他们那里,却没来我这里。为何?是我不够忠信?祂忘了我?还是故意将我排除在外?”


这才是多默真正的痛苦。不是对复活的理性怀疑,而是被排斥的伤口。他当时不在场,错过了那次显现。在这八日的沉寂中,他的缺席化作一声低语:“你不配,你不被爱。其他门徒都特殊,你被遗弃了。”


你是否也有过这样的经验?在祈祷团体中,他人谈着恩宠,你静坐无语;在感恩祭中,他人喜极而泣,你却毫无触动;在失落时,别人似乎领受天主的记号,你的心却如荒漠一般空旷。这就是多默的感受,也是你我的感受。

多默的那句名言——“除非我看见钉痕,并把手指探入祂的肋膀,否则我不会相信”——并非科学实证的要求,而是受伤心灵的呼喊:“祢若真实,就让我看见;祢若爱我,就证明给我。因为此刻,我觉得自己就是被遗忘的门徒,是被祢忽略的人。”


他对同伴们说这话时,或许声音太大,带着苦涩的锋芒。众人都沉默了,不知如何回应。在那静默中,多默后悔自己的冲动,可话已出口,无法收回,他的要求依然立着。

第八天到了,又是一周的第一天。门徒再次聚集,这次多默来了。他差点没来,想裹着“伤痛的毯子”待在家里,可某种力量——希望?习惯?对旧团体的念想?——把他拉了回来。他坐在角落,一言不发,不抱期待。


耶稣就在那里。


没有敲门,没有开门,唯有临在。同样问候:“愿平安与你们同在。”接着,耶稣没有指责,也没有责备,径直转向多默,温和地说出那句曾被多默当作挑战的话:“把你的手指伸到这里,看看我的手!伸出你的手,探入我的肋旁。不要作不信的人,而要相信。”

这就是多默灵性生命的转折点。他曾说:“除非我触摸,否则我不会相信。”但当他真正面对复活的主,他却没有触摸。经文没有说他触摸了,只说了他的回应:“我主,我的天主!”


为什么,那一瞬间发生了什么?

多默终于明白:他对触摸的执着,不是为了触摸本身,而是为了被人看见,被人认识,他希望救主能认可他 —— 多默,那曾不在场的门徒,那个感觉自己被冷落的门徒,那个因痛苦而鲁莽发言的门徒。而耶稣,不仅回应了他的要求,甚至用他自己的话来回应他。这意味着耶稣俯允了他。耶稣听到了八天前,他在这锁着的屋子里说的愤怒的话。耶稣没有忘记他,反而专程为他而来。


那一刻,多默不再需要触摸。耶稣提出让他触摸的邀请,已是足够的证明——主知道他的名字,明白他的伤口,知他隐秘的羞耻,却依然走向他。没有说教,没有“我早说过”,只有邀请:“来看吧,触摸吧,真的是我。”


多默的心扉豁然敞开,不是因为证据,而是因为爱。八日来的煎熬——嫉妒、恐惧、被弃感、自我厌弃——在一声呼喊中尽数消散。“我主,我的天主!”这不是神学术语,是认出祂的惊叹:“祢属于我,我也属于祢。我从未被排除,祢一直等我回来。”

如果你就是今天的多默 —— 如果你未曾看见,如果你感到被忽视,如果你的祈祷撞上沉默的天花板,如果你的创伤已化为苛刻的要求 —— 请你记得:救主不会因你诚实的痛苦而受到冒犯。祂从来没有把你拒之门外。祂期待你回到那扇紧闭的门后、回到团体之中。而当你回去的时候,祂已在那里。祂会呼唤你的名字,祂会展示祂的圣伤。你不一定需要触摸。你只需要跪下,说:“我主,我的天主。”

© 全属于祢 & 乐仁出版社(中国澳门)
Cum Approbatione Ecclesiastica 2026

Homily for 2nd Sunday of Easter Year A in 2026


The Unseen Wound: A Reflection on Thomas’s Inner Journey
John 20:19-31

Fr. Jijo Kandamkulathy, CMF
Claretian Missionaries

Let me take you inside the mind of Thomas. Not the cartoon “doubter” we have reduced him to. Not the stubborn empiricist demanding laboratory proof. But a real man, shattered by grief, living through the most confusing eight days of his life.

The first day of the week. Mary Magdalene had come running with impossible words: “I have seen the Lord.” Thomas heard her. He wanted to believe. But grief has a way of turning hope into an accusation. If he is alive, where was he when they killed him? Where was he when I ran away?

That evening, the others gathered behind locked doors. Thomas was not there. We do not know why. Perhaps he needed air. Perhaps he could not stand their fearful whispers. Perhaps he had gone to weep alone. When he returned, their faces were different. Peter was almost laughing. John had tears—but not of sorrow. And they told him: “We have seen the Lord.”

Thomas listened. He said nothing. But inside, a storm began.

You have seen? All of you? While I was out? While I was alone in my misery, he came to you? Why not to me? Did I do something wrong? Did I desert him too quickly? Did he count my denial worse than Peter’s? Peter denied him with curses, and still Jesus showed himself to Peter. But to me? Nothing.

That night, Thomas lay awake. He replayed every moment of the past week. The arrest. The trial. The hill. The darkness at noon. The cry. The silence. He had loved Jesus with a fierce, practical love. When Jesus said, “Let us go to Lazarus, even if it means dying,” Thomas was the one who said, “Let us also go, that we may die with him.” He was no coward. He was a man who wanted to walk into death with his teacher. But when death came, Thomas ran like everyone else. And the shame of that running—it was a wound deeper than any nail mark.

Now the others claimed they had seen. They described the room. The locked doors. The sudden presence. The greeting: “Peace be with you.” The showing of hands and side. Thomas listened to every detail. His heart raced. His mind fought back.

Are they lying? No, they are not liars. Are they hallucinating? Grief does strange things. But ten people do not have the same hallucination. Unless… unless it is true.

And then came the terrible thought: If it is true, then he came to them and not to me. Why? Was I not faithful enough? Did I not love him enough? Did he forget me? Did he choose to leave me out?

This is the agony of Thomas. It is not intellectual doubt about resurrection. It is the wound of feeling excluded. He was not there. He missed the visitation. And in the silence of those eight days, that absence became a voice whispering: You are not worthy. You are not loved. The others are special. You are left behind.

Have you felt this? In prayer groups, when others speak of consolations, and you sit silent. In the Eucharist, when others weep with joy, and you feel nothing. In moments of loss, when everyone else seems to have received a sign, and your heaven is empty. That is Thomas. That is us.

His famous demand—“Unless I see the mark of the nails and put my finger into his side, I will not believe”—was not a scientific requirement. It was a cry of a wounded heart. If you are real, show me. If you love me, prove it. Because right now, I feel like the forgotten disciple. The one you passed over.

He said those words to his friends, perhaps too loudly. Perhaps with a bitter edge. They fell silent. They did not know what to say. And in that silence, Thomas regretted his outburst. Now they will think I am faithless. Now they will pity me. Or judge me. But he could not take it back. The demand stood.

Then came the eighth day. The first day of a new week. The disciples were gathered again. This time, Thomas came. He almost did not. He almost stayed home, wrapped in his blanket of hurt. But something—hope? habit? a flicker of hunger for the old community?—pulled him back. He sat in the corner, not speaking, expecting nothing.

And then Jesus was there.

No knock. No opening of doors. Just presence. The same greeting: “Peace be with you.” And then, without accusation, without reproach, Jesus turned to Thomas. Directly. Gently. And he said the words that Thomas had hurled like a challenge: “Put your finger here and see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Do not be unbelieving, but believe.”

Here is the moment of inner drama. Thomas had said, “Unless I touch, I will not believe.” But now, faced with the Risen Lord, he does not touch. The text does not say he touched. It says he answered, “My Lord and my God!”

Why? What happened in that split second?

Thomas realized that his demand for touch was never really about touch. It was about being seen. It was about being known. It was about the Lord acknowledging him—Thomas, the one who was absent, the one who felt left out, the one who had spoken rashly out of pain. And Jesus did not just grant his demand. Jesus quoted his demand back to him. That meant Jesus had heard him. Jesus had been listening to his angry words spoken in the locked room eight days earlier. Jesus had not forgotten him. Jesus had come back—specifically for him.

In that moment, Thomas did not need to touch. The offer of touch was enough. The offer was the proof. Because it meant that the Lord knew his name, knew his wound, knew his secret shame, and still came to him. Not with a lecture. Not with “I told you so.” But with an invitation: “Here. See. Touch. It is really me.”

Thomas’s heart broke open. Not from proof. From love. All the agony of eight days—the jealousy, the fear, the sense of abandonment, the self-loathing—drained away in a single cry. “My Lord and my God!” Not a theological formula. A gasp of recognition. You are mine. And I am yours. And I was never left out. You were waiting for me to come back to the room.

If you are the Thomas today—if you have not seen, if you feel passed over, if your prayers hit a ceiling of silence, if your wounds have turned into demands—know this: The Lord is not offended by your honest agony. He is not keeping you out. He is waiting for you to return to the locked room of the community. And when you do, he will already be there. He will call your name. He will offer you his wounds. And you will not need to touch. You will only need to fall down and say, “My Lord and my God.”

© Claretian Publications, Macau
Cum Approbatione Ecclesiastica